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Thursday, April 27, 2006

Elmo Goes to War


Sesame workshop and Wal-mart are producing a DVD, starring little red retarded Elmo and big red shell-shocked Elmodaddy, to help little kids deal with issues involved with military families and parents who are deployed in the Iraq and Afghanistan. Though the plot is still a closely guarded secret, The Rude Pundit has an idea about how it might go down when Elmodaddy comes back home to Sesame Street.

Elmo Doesn't Like It When Daddy Screams In His Sleep:

...Then how cute it'll be when Elmodaddy discovers he's got no job he can possibly do, being so fucked up from his injuries, and so he starts to drink, which doesn't help the nightmares, the way he's gotta get up every night to walk the perimeter inside his own home, and the fact that he can't fuck Elmomommy anymore, and Elmo disappears ever more into his fantasy land of psychic goldfish, smiling computers, and strange bow-tied men and women who mime their misunderstanding of basic language outside his window.

Of course, that's all might be wishful thinking. The whole thing could end with Elmodaddy being ripped to cloth and stuffing shreds by an IED because his government couldn't afford to equip him with the armor he needed to protect his red fuzzy ass. Then we can watch as Elmo radicalizes, marches, and chants, "One, two, three, four, Elmo doesn't want your fucking war." And, hey, he'll still be teaching the children how to count.




Tuesday, April 25, 2006

Section 603


Who would have thunk it? Jefferson that's who!

Section 603 of Jefferson's Manual of the Rules of the United States House of Representatives states Impeachment can be initiated in several ways.


... by charges made on the floor on the responsibility of a Member or Delegate ...by charges preferred by a memorial, which is usually referred to a committee for examination ...or by a resolution dropped in the hopper by a Member and referred to a committee... by a message from the President... by charges transmitted from the legislature of a State ... or Territory ... or from a grand jury ...or from facts developed and reported by an investigating committee of the House


Both the Illinios and California legislatures are moving to charge Bush and begin the proceedings.

California Becomes Second State to Introduce Bush Impeachment




Walker Peace Brigade on Trial


18 Antiwar `Grannies' on Trial in New York

oldfu
NEW YORK — Eighteen antiwar protesters who call themselves the Granny Peace Brigade went on trial Thursday for staging a rally in Times Square last year, with the prosecution saying the case was about disorderly conduct — not war.
The defendants, some supporting themselves on canes and walkers, entered the small courtroom packed with about 75 supporters. They are each charged with two counts of disorderly conduct stemming from an Oct. 17, 2005, protest against the Iraq war outside the military recruiting station in Times Square.
...
The women — several in their 80s and 90s — wore buttons that read: "Granny Peace Brigade" and "Love the Troops, Hate the War." Some wore T-shirts that said: "We will not be silent."


Give em hell grandma...




Wednesday, April 19, 2006

The Decider


Bush is no Alan Turning

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Decider

"In computability theory, a machine that always halts — also called a decider (Sipser, 1996) — is any abstract machine or model of computation that, contrary to the most general Turing machines, is guaranteed to halt for any particular description and input (see halting problem)."
...
"In practice, a machine that always halts can be implemented as a programming language with restricted flow control instructions, so that no program (i.e. description) will ever cause the machine to enter an infinite loop."
...
Machines that always halt are less powerful than Turing machines, as the following theorem shows:

There are (Turing-)computable total functions that are not computable by any machine that always halts.

...(see theorem)

Despite the above theorem, it is possible to construct a machine that always halts and yet computes the majority of functions of interest (the so-called primitive recursive functions),
...
primitive recursive functions... hate...war...greed.

“I’m the decider” Mr. Bush said


Continue reading the post...


I’m of the opinion that Bush is Halting all the time as he is guaranteed to halt for any particular description and input

“Mr President, we need more troops for Iraq invasion…”

HALT !

“Mr President, things aren’t looking good in Iraq…”

HALT !

“Mr President, we have this Hurricane and…”

HALT !

“Mr President, the constitution says…”

HALT !

and so on and so on and so on….

Kind of a variation of “Talk to the hand”.

~